Is Body Neutrality going big time??

A possible change in the body image discourse from the least obvious place.

Reality TV has almost certainly contributed to a tremendous amount of body image issues for those who consume the content. Many shows perpetuate diet culture and maintain an over-emphasis on appearance. I have known this about reality television since watching MTV, where it was hard not to compare what I looked like to the similarly aged stars who tended to check all conventional beauty boxes.

That said, I have a guilty pleasure to confess: I love Bravo.

I can’t believe I am disclosing this factoid in such an academically oriented space, but I have watched the Real Housewives of OC since it began when I was in college. I enjoy the mindlessness of the shows and how you can sort of follow the drama at any point in episodes—while doing any number of other activities. I also find the fashions intriguing, enjoy the bright colors, and even get a kick out of the messiness among the women. Sidebar: Sometimes I wonder if the show inspired my dissertation topic, which examined relational aggression and competition among women. Whether it did or not, this network continues to offer me—and many others—a sense of much-craved escapism.

But there is an aspect of Bravo that I have struggled with: the inevitable emphasis on bodies. These women throw themselves into the spotlight for their fifteen minutes, and they tend to become consumed with their looks. On the show, viewers are privy to inappropriate comments made between cast members. The “Bravoleberties,” as they are called, have often discussed dieting and plastic surgery procedures, and the women generally have a fixation on youth and appearance.

I go through seasons of watching more Bravo than other times. While my bandwidth for trashy TV is limited these days, I am guilty of listening to some podcasts that summarize much of the drama. (We all need some silly way to escape.)

While I do not think the “Bravosphere”, is about to have some overhaul on how they talk about bodies and appearance, I did find something one Housewife mentioned a desire to move away from being so weight obsessed in an interview with ABC to be interesting and promising:

Heather Gay of RHOSLC fame, recently declared she is done with Ozempic and working toward body neutrality. This caught me entirely off guard. I actually watched the first few episodes of Salt Lake and found the focal point of bodies and weight loss to be more than I wanted to take in, so I stopped. But hearing that a Bravo Housewife wants to take on a more neutral approach to her body really has me curious.

I am an eating disorder specialist. I have worked with clients for many years, through many trends and movements in both the field and mainstream social media. Some of these concepts have many overlapping ideas, but ultimately, in recovering from any kind of disordered eating behavior, folks will encounter one or more of these approaches to one’s body: Body Positivity, Body Liberation, Body Neutrality and Body Acceptance.

So what is the difference between all of these, and why does it matter that a reality TV star made mention of “body neutrality?”

In a nutshell, body acceptance could be considered an umbrella term that covers approaching one’s body without disdain or criticism. From there, body positivity, in its mainstream social media iteration, refers to embracing one’s body, claiming it, and often even sharing with others that you might be “loving” your body. Body positivity is fraught with issues since it became an incredibly successful social media movement. For one, this movement ‘s origins in the 1970’s was rooted in marginalized groups trying to draw attention to the inherent racism in fat phobia, and by the time it was popularized on social media it had become vastly different. It can be confusing to hear someone who has all the thin-privilege in the world proclaim that they are “body positive.” The movement became watered down, and this issue was more openly discussed by folks in the fat community. So how does moving away from body positivity create (no pun) positive outcomes?

Well, a shift away from body positivity allows for a conversation that challenges systems of oppression that stigmatize specific bodies in the first place. Body liberation calls attention to the oppressive nature of diet culture and promotes acceptance and enjoyment of all bodies. Ultimately paving the way for the hopeful and judgement free body neutral stance towards one’s body. Body neutrality allows for curiosity and understanding towards any and all thoughts one might have towards their appearance.

Tackling one’s body image is a complicated journey. When moving away from diet culture, we must not only change our relationship with food, but we also have to address what many refer to as the “hardest” piece of the puzzle: moving the needle on how we feel about our bodies. Diet culture thrives when we chase our tails and fixate on changing our bodies.

So the fact that Heather Gay, someone who is on reality TV—on a network that promotes thin ideals—and has openly struggled with accepting her body is now stating she would like to move towards a place of neutrality seems like a BIG DEAL. For a minute, body positivity felt like the gold standard in someone’s body image journey— but trying to embrace neutrality has always been far more appealing to me and my clients.

I appreciated introducing this conversation with clients in my earlier years as a clinician. It was a much easier pill for them to swallow than the “Love your Body” rhetoric that predated the mainstream body positivity. But the more the field of eating disorder recovery progresses, the more body neutrality is presented as a major step in the process of healing one’s relationship to their body.

Author, Jessi Kneeland, recently published her book, Body Neutral, where she describes the benefits of leaning into a more neutral stance towards one’s body. This concept has been gaining traction slowly. Between a Bravo Housewife and a mainstream book, it looks like the term “neutrality” is expanding outside of therapists’ and dietitians’ offices. Others on Bravo have shared their journey of disordered eating, too. Jackie, one of the New Jersey Housewives, is a great example—her journey was a major part of her story-line. However, something about the introduction of “neutrality” feels slightly different. Perhaps these women could start talking less about what they look like, and maybe even comment on other aspects of their castmates’ lives. It is often said that “the kids are off limits,.” Perhaps appearance could one day be a nonstarter as well. It’s a small glimmer of hope in a very shiny sea of vapid story lines, but I can see the tagline now: “I might be neutral about my body, but there is nothing neutral about my reads.” Heather, that one’s all yours if you’d like it.